plans

one day at camp I was talking with a friend and the Holy Spirit spoke a truth through me that we both needed to hear in our lives. we were talking about wanting to do what God wants with our lives. about not “missing” what God had planned for us.

wisdom pt. 1 “He has multiple plans for us”

more than one. plans. plural. not just one grand plan. not just one on ramp for a single plan that we might miss if we don’t have perfect timing. plans. I have been thinking about this as I come to new chapter of my life. I am on the brink of starting an internship and finishing my final semester of college. however, things aren’t exactly going peachy. I’m in a predicament. and I’m desperately trying to figure out what to do. I thought the Lord was calling me to go somewhere. I got an internship and everything. and surely, the Lord would not let that happen if He wasn’t the one calling me to do this. but I had a really hard time finding an apartment to live in during the internship time. I found one. but honestly, the whole situation is more than I can handle. the cost, the lease term, the hours. all of it. I could make it work. it could happen. it wouldn’t be the worst thing that has ever happened. but for some reason, this morning I woke up with such unrest and the total opposite of peace about this move. and instead, I have a super strong urge/desire to stay in my hometown. I don’t even know all that that means. I don’t know if that is stay here with an internship. I don’t know if that means stay here and defer a semester and get a job. I literally do not know. but I’m scared.

but as I’m scared, completely unsure and confused, I am reminded of these words, “multiple plans.” I am reminded that God has several plans for me. while I might have one, straight plan for myself, He has multiple. and He will walk with me through all of them. as I am reminded of this, I am reminded that whatever and wherever I am lead this upcoming semester, God will be with me. I am not missing what He has in store. it’s my job to be open to it.

wisdom pt.2 “we can’t ruin His plans”

we can’t. we cannot ruin God’s plans. how prideful it is for me to think I can ruin the plans of the Almighty God of the Universe’s plans. that is so self-centered and selfish. I might not always pick His ways or paths, but I can’t ruin what He has. I can only be saved by what He is offering. in all aspects of the word. and I am trying really hard to let myself be saved.

I just went to the store and was picking out a card for dad’s birthday, and I opened a random card to find this bible verse:

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing,

┬áso that you may abound in hope by the power of the holy Spirit” – Romans 15:13

of course. that is totally God sending me that verse. so. I am praying for joy and peace as I am continuing to believe in Him and His promises.

come, Holy Spirit, come

part six: come

at camp we spend so much time in prayer. so much time. it was beautiful. constantly taking everything to prayer, living in the word of God, going to mass daily, seriously so good. during this time, something really stood out to me. there is something consistent and special in the way Jesus talks, and the words He uses in the Gospel.

He uses the word “come.

When He calls the men to be fishers of men, “Come after me,” (Matthew 4:19)

When He brings Lazarus back to life, “Lazarus, come out,” (John 11:43)

When He calls Peter to walk on the water, “Come,” (Matthew 14:29)

I’m sure these are only a few examples. but these were the examples that stood out to me during camp.

I am really overwhelmed by how simple and direct He is. there aren’t a lot of other instructions given. it’s so simple. just “come.” it makes me think about how often I overcomplicate things, even things the Lord tells or shows me. it is such a sweet, simple invitation. that is all I have to do. come. and as I come, He will change my heart. He will supply me with what I need. He will carry me through the storms. He is so inviting.

but in that invitation, we can also call on HIm. we can also call Him to “come” and He always does. He can’t not come. in His nature, by who He is, He has to come every single time we call Him. how powerful is that?! the hard part for us to trust that. believing the truth of that. holding onto the truth of His promises. and that is definitely hard.

and that is where I’m at. learning to trust in His promise and providence. learning how to “come.” and as usual, I am making it more complicated than it needs to be. I am overthinking it. I am trying to find the simplicity in coming after Jesus. in pursuing His most Sacred Heart. the best part is, I don’t have to do it alone. `He sends us His Holy Spirit to guide us and help us come closer. as I am continuing to figure out how to come after Jesus more fully and completely, I am calling upon His Holy Spirit to get me there.

the cove

so I just got back from camp. six weeks in the forest of north Georgia. being a summer missionary. ministering to 250 high school teens, more specifically about 15, and a few chaperones/ youth ministers, a week. growing in community with 23 other summary missionaries, and many many more missionaries. but most importantly, growing, nurturing and deepening my relationship with my living God. so much happened in the past six weeks. I can’t wait to unpack it all here.mass at the cove