so if you ask me who i am the closest to in the trinity, the answer is the Holy Spirit. actually, other people can answer that question for me. and of course i love Jesus. so much. i think of Him as being so romantic and loving and healing and sweet and comforting. and then there is God, the Father. and He is great. i have never doubted Him. i always knew He loved me, but He seemed more distant. more involved in the day to day running the world, answering prayers part of being God than my day to day intimacy.
oh intimacy. what a scary word. in-to-me-see. fun play on words, right? but so scary. for me at least. what does it even mean to be fully seen and fully known? and how scary is it to think that someone would see all of me and still want to be around me?
i think of Jesus as being more intimate. and maybe i am more comfortable with that. the Eucharist is a pretty easy explanation of intimacy-something i can see, touch and consume. Jesus was also human, so i can relate to Him on that level, too. the Holy Spirit isn’t so much of a stretch with intimacy, because i think of Him as a spirit-no end and no beginning, fluid. plus, He is with me ALL the time and we are constantly talking, so I think of Him as being pretty close. but then there is God, again. and intimacy with Him seems far off, scary and maybe even dangerous. like if God really saw me and knew me, maybe He wouldn’t let me have Jesus & the Holy Spirit anymore. maybe He would pull the troops. plus, does God even want to know me? He seems pretty busy creating life & curing diseases.
& ya know, i don’t think God loved that i thought like that. the past few weeks, He has been pretty clear in getting my attention and turning the spotlight back on Him. it’s been funny, I feel like Jesus has been bowing out a lot, like “this one is between you guys” i have been learning so much about the Father.
- that being one of them, that He is a FATHER. and He loves His children and wants to know them.
- His heart is to provide for them and give them good things.
- His nature is compassion & kindness.
- He is so selfless, He lets me be friends with the other Godheads more when I need it.
- It was always His plan to save us & bring us back to Him through Jesus.
- When Jesus was on Earth, He only did what He saw the Father doing.
- AKA THE FATHER IS AS INTIMATE, HEALING, CARING, LOVING, ROMANTIC, SWEET AND COMFORTING AS I THINK OF JESUS BEING.
- The Father is so tender & gentle.
- He wants a personal relationship as much as Jesus & the Holy Spirit do!
- His love is SO deep for us.
- He treasures us.
- He holds back nothing that will heal us, not even His own Son.
- He is jealous for us.
- He is active in our lives and desires an active relationship with us.
- He is not something to be shelved until we get in deep trouble and need to call in the “big guns,” He desires to be just as involved in the little things from day to day.
- He never tires of hearing our praise.
- He never tires of forgiving us.
- He never tires of hearing our stories.
- He is chopping at the bit to heal us.
- He cries with us.
- He laughs with us (and i’m convinced sometimes at us).
- He is good.
- He is warm.
- He is so detailed orientated.
- He hangs on our every word.
- He delights in the process.
- He delights in us.
I am still learning about Him. He is constantly revealing more to me & it is so freakin’ fun! I am so thankful for the Father’s heart.
Father, thank you for your relentless pursuit of your beloved. thank you for revealing your heart to me, Father. as i learn more about you & your heart, teach me how to be like you. i desire to know you more.